Dr. Chen's Corner

Why I don’t take insurance

“Why don’t you take insurance?” I was on many insurance panels for many years.…

Consideration for EMDR Consultation Services

Many clinicians who finished the first weekend or the basic training of EMDR never…

Couple Therapy and Medical Insurance

“Hi, My name is XXXX. My significant other and I are looking for couple’s…

Goodbye 2020. Hello 2021~ Word of the Year

Goodbye 2020. Hello 2021~ Word of the Year

How do I use the word of the year in that particular year? It…

COVID-19 Week 12 (6/1 to 6/5) Journal

COVID-19 Week 12 (6/1 to 6/5) Journal

The two important news this week are: 1) the anticipated announcement of phase two…

“What Ifs” (Part II) — “I trust in myself.”

“What Ifs” (Part II) — “I trust in myself.”

The treatment goal is for the clients to trust their judgment, to trust their…

“What-Ifs” (Part I) — Control and Anxiety

I believe that any part in us used to be a survival strategy, and…

COVID-19 Week 11 (5/25 to 5/29) Journal

The important news of the week was the business opening. I am not sure…

COVID- 19 Week 10 (5/18 to 5/22) Journal

“Maybe there is no solution. Maybe there is no compromise on how to proceed.…

COVID- 19 Week 9 (5/11 to 5/15) Journal

My logical mind knows that the only thing that is never going to change…

COVID- 19 Week 8 (5/4 to 5/8) Journal

Week 8, (5/4 to 5/8), is it week 8 into the COVID-19 State of…

COVID- 19 Week 7 (4/27 to 5/1) Journal

I found myself in two emotions. The first one was a complete sense of…

COVID- 19 Week 6 (4/20 to 4/24) Journal

Moving into week 6 (4/20 to 4/27), I am tired and exhausted from another…

Crisis—- A Dangerous Opportunity

In Chinese characters, the word crisis looks like this "危機". There are two characters,…

COVID- 19 Week 5 (4/13 to 4/17) Journal

Moving into week 5 (4/13 to 4/17), I am tired from the training over…

COVID- 19 Week 4 (4/6 to 4/10) Journal

Moving into the 4th week (4/6 to 4/10), I can feel a sense of…

Stress Reaction- Overthinking

I sprained my ankle last week. Yeah, I know, right? How can this happen?…

COVID- 19 Week 3 (3/30 to 4/3) Journal

Moving into the 3rd week (3/30 to 4/3), I finally feel that I have a…

Stress Reaction — Stress Eating

What’s your stress reaction that you are not aware but showing up somatic? In…

COVID- 19 Week 2 (3/23 to 3/27) Journal

This week is chaotic. "Flexible" is the word I have been keeping in mind.…

COVID- 19 Week 1 (3/16-3/20/2020) Journal

The first week (3/16-3/20) was chaotic for me.

[Relationship] Expectations & Fairness

Do I communicate my “expectation” of what’s fair clearly? How do I know my…

[Depression & Anxiety] YouTube Yoga

Here are the channels I have tried and would like to share with you.…

New Year Resolution 2019: Take Charge of the Change

Change is scary, but it helps to take charge instead of being pushed to…

[Podcast of the Week]{12/17/18} 10 Non-Psychological Causes of Anxiety And…

The physical issues related to anxiety and depression are digestive problems, hormonal imbalances, thyroid…

Surviving Holiday Stress with In-Laws (II)

By understanding and accepting your partner’s feelings and perspectives, you offer your acceptance. More…

Surviving Holiday Stress with In-Laws (I)

No matter it’s Chinese, American, or Hispanics, etc.. I can’t tell you how many…

[Podacst of the Week][12/3/18] Angry? Try Loving Kindness

Anger is one of the natural emotions, which means we can’t get rid of…

[The Myth of Sexaul Abuse # 3] Dr. Christine Blasey…

Unable to recall the specifics outside the trauma events but remembering the trauma memory…

[The Myth of Sexaul Abuse # 3] Dr. Christine Blasey…

No matter what’s the reason we lie, the bottom line is: we lie to…

When the chaos becomes norm

Children, without full cognitive, emotional, and brain development, growing up the chaotic household might…

[Podcast of the Week] [091718]Surviving Overwhelming Feelings

To prevent yourself from getting overwhelmed, the most crucial step is to take control…

[Couple Relationship] How much do I give to my relationship?

Equal partnership is vital for a healthy relationship. However, what does equal mean to…

[Podcast of the Week] [091018]”Your life is here, not somewhere…

“Your life isn’t on hold until your dreams come true. You are still alive…

[Podcast of the Week] [090318]Immigrant Mentality and Fear

Do you listen to the podcast? I have to admit that I am really…

How Do You Give Love?

Maybe, we should start to learn to pay more attention to how our partners…

How Do You Ask for Support

When we ask for the support from our significant other, especially when it relates…

Which role do you play, victim, persecutor, or rescuer? —…

crucial questions to maintain "I am OK and You are OK":  What is the…

Which role do you play, victim, persecutor, or rescuer?—Drama Triangle…

Do you feel regularly lock into a specific role and still unable to get…

Which role do you play, victim, persecutor, or rescuer?—Drama Triangle…

We all play victims, persecutors, and/or rescuers, in our daily life. The goal of…

Change is Harder for the Couples — How Do We…

     “No one loses anyone, because no one owns anyone. That is the…

Change is Harder for the Couples— Why?

“When we love, we always strive to become better than we are. When we…

Change is Hard (Part III)–How Do We Change it?

     If you didn’t have an adult to provide the boundary of safety…

Change is Hard (Part II) — Why?

Reason # 1: The old pattern used to be a survival strategy or to…

Change is Hard (Part I)— Is it possible?

We all know that personality is generally pretty stable even though the recent studies…

Change your thoughts doesn’t necessarily lead to change your feelings.

"“In any situation, planned or unexpected, we all have the desired outcome. In spite…

Family Life Cycle and Couple Relationship: What Does Cedar Cove…

This theory tremendously helpful to understand the couples’ relationship history. It helps to see…

Family Life Cycle and Couple Relationship: What Does Cedar Cove…

"Later, because of their daughters. Dan and Grace had tried hard to make their…

From “13 Reasons Why” to “Facing Your Truth” — Epilogue

Everyone, including myself, spends a lot of time worrying, planning, and thinking about the…

From “13 Reasons Why” to “Facing Your Truth” – “Facing…

Our first step is to help her feel safe when she is in school…

From “13 Reasons Why” to “Facing Your Truth” – “Facing…

What we don’t often think about is the reaction from “the innocent bystander” also…

[Myth about Sexual Abuse # 2]—“Who Caused the Trouble?”

Who is the actual troublemaker? It is the perpetrator who is the troublemaker but…

From “13 Reasons Why” to “Facing Your Truth” — “I…

1. Being vulnerable doesn’t mean you are weak. It says you are strong enough…

From “13 Reasons Why” to “Facing Your Truth” — “I…

when you can face the shame, leave the judgment, face your sadness instead of…

From “13 Reasons Why” to “Facing Your Truth” – “It’s…

Your disappointment, shame, guilt, or helplessness about your behavior is not who you are.…

From “13 Reasons Why” to “Facing Your Truth” – “It’s…

When the other people’s judgment on us becomes how we judge ourselves and when…

From “13 Reasons Why” to “Facing Your Truth” — “I…

1. To be able to see the truth about other people, you have to…

From “13 Reasons Why” to “Facing Your Truth” — “I…

To see the truth about other people, we have to be able to face…

From “13 Reasons Why” to “Facing Your Truth” — “I…

This exercise might elicit different feelings that “feels like” hard to tolerate. If it…

From “13 Reasons Why” to “Facing Your Truth” — “I…

There is no right or wrong for the way you want people to see…

From “13 Reasons Why” to “Facing Your Truth”— “Truth”

“I have heard so many stories about me now, but I don’t know which…

From “13 Reasons Why” To “Facing Your Truth” — Prologue

By evaluating the plots and the characters in the show, I hope to provide…

New Year, New Boundary (Part 2)

You don’t have to give up your virtue or your value. However, you need…

New Year, New Boundary (Part I)

Most of my clients’ suffering is not because they are bad people who did…

[Myth about Sexual Abuse # 1]–“What Does A Perpetrator Look…

The main point I want to make is this: There are many victims out…

Divorce, Co-Parenting, and Mental Health

It is essential to know the symptoms of depression and/or anxiety. When your experiences/emotions…

Divorce & Co-Parenting

Even when you have conflicts with your spouse, you still need to invest time…

Depression and Marital Satisfaction

You cannot take it too personally. You have to take it personal enough to…

Family Life Cycle and Couple Relationship: What Does Cedar Cove…

Just a friendly reminder that you might want to read these articles before you…

Divorce Process in Massachusetts

As a couple’s therapist, I would never tell anyone to get a divorce. I…

[Couple Communication] “We Don’t Have Time to Talk.”

Problems are not the problem. Coping is the problem. ~ Virginia Satir It was…

[Couple Communication] What Really Happened?

Do you hear what other people are trying to tell you? Or, in the…

‘Love Yourself”: “I am exhausted!”

“So, how long is this (therapy) going to take?” I am often asked by…

“Love Yourself”: What Does that Even Mean?

Yes, my dear readers, one of the true meanings of “love myself” is not…

Five things to say instead of saying “Stop Crying.” :…

I had a very rough summer this year. This summer, two of the elders…

Five Steps to Take Instead of Saying “Stop Feeling This…

I had a very rough summer this year. This summer, two of the elders…

Words of Wisdom from my Successful Couple: “Can Our Relationship…

  As a therapist, I don’t often know the “outcome” of the clients after…

Words of Wisdom from my Successful Couple: “Can Our Relationship…

Show your partner that he/she is on your mind. Make sure that he/she knows…

Words of Wisdom from my Successful Couple: “Can Our Relationship…

Acceptance is not just about accepting the situation or the other person. It is…

A Therapist’s Confession about the Couple Retreat

It’s another weekend retreat finished. I come home with excitement but exhaustion. It’s tiring,…

[Working with Immigrants] Working with Hispanic Adult Children with Immigrant…

Culture is also a shared meaning created by people from different historical and geographic…

[Working with Immigrants] Working with Hispanic Adult Children with Immigrant…

The implication here is that, as a therapist, our job is not just about…

[Anxiety] Everything Works out in the End

If my brain is like a car, the thought would be the gas and…

[Working with Immigrants] Working with Hispanic Adult Children with Immigrant…

by understanding the history of the country of origin, it helps to assess the…

[Depression & Anxiety] Useful Apps and to help with Meditation

First Published on 6/30/2017 Updated on 9/2/2019 In the month of June 2017, I…

[Working with Immigrants] Self-Assessment as a Provider

I struggled to continue writing this series of article for a few weeks. My…

[Depression & Anxiety] Just One More Step

Do you have the same experience, hearing your “Be perfect Self" beating you down?…

Premarital Couple’s Education: Interview by the Valley Girls on 6/21/2017

Interview by the Valley Girls on 6/21/2017. I had a great time with these…

Gender Schema Theory, Gender Role Expectation and Couple’s Relationship

ask yourself this: what’s your expectation about the male vs. female, or husband vs…

Gender Schema Theory, Gender Role Expectation and Couple’s Relationship (Part…

The Gender Schema Theory proposed that there is a specific cognitive structure with attributes…

[Working With Immigrants] Assessment (Part 2)

Family resilience can be defined as a multilevel process of interaction between families and…

[Working with Immigrants]Assessment (Part I)

...an individual’s decision to immigrate and the chances to be successful in the immigration…

[Working with Immigrant] Introduction

  The idea to share my experience working with immigrant population has been on…

Coping with the Holiday Sree; Loving the Scrooge in You…

Just like Scrooges needs the Christmas Spirits to help him get out his slump,…

Coping with the Holiday Stress; Loving the Scrooge in You…

Every day, when you cross the items on your list or when you see…

Coping with the Holiday Stress; Loving the Scrooge in You…

Holiday triggers the memories of the family, and the family triggers the memories of…

“Is there a dream, a belief, or a story behind…

Remember, if a person is so strongly believe in something, there is usually a…

“Why is Half the Nation OK with Sexual Assault?” —-After…

I plead to you, when someone is telling you he/she is scared, try to…

From Election to Relationship — After Election # 1

Next time, before you convicted your partner, think about this: “We are connected with…

Change is hard and life is a series of choices

Change is hard and life is a series of choices

It makes sense to choose the new behaviors but it is so much easier…

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